New Toulouse

Bent Gent
Gasner Alecillo, a member of the crew of the steamship Brunswick, reported to the police that he was robbed of L$30 in New Toulouse Friday night while under the influence of liquor. He does not know how it happened, and the police have been unable to learn the identity of the guilty parties.

Mobile Misappropriation
Sunday night, Mr. Philip Huffman, of 44 Pontalba street, reported that he was the victim of a pickpocket, and that he was relieved of a gold watch and fob valued at L$200. It is stated that the pickpockets did their work while on the streetcar, as several other persons reported being relieved of valuables.

Reptile Rescue
A woman called police Monday morning when she found an upside-down turtle in her garden. The officer told her to turn the turtle right side up. She did but called back to report that the turtle had no arms, legs, or head. The officer told her not to worry, and the turtle fled in an unknown direction before police arrived.

A STING OPERATION uncovered a brisk heroin trade occurring at the clam stall at Flanagan’s Fun Fair. One woman who ran the clam stall has been arrested on drug charges. Any “hophead” seeking the potent snuff was able, with the right password and the right amount of cash, to receive it concealed within a serving of clams.

A CONFLAGRATION on the top floor of the No. 23 Firehouse late on Tuesday was brought under control quickly. It is believed that anarchists armed with an infernal device were responsible.

A CARNIVAL WORKER was arrested for operating the “swing boats” ride while intoxicated.