New Toulouse

Dear Tattler—

Please clarify that while “several who have gone gunning for these birds have been arrested,” no New Toulouse hunter has yet been arrested, fined, or even detained for hunting the local gros-bec out of season. Your warning is appreciated, it is possible that these penalties might apply outside of our fair district.

Please also tell your readers that the mayor is offering a reward for the report any sightings of any member of the “Conservation Commission of Louisiana.”

Individuals who are night hunting or spot lighting are requested to avoid shooting the Pic à bec d’ivoire, or Ivory-Billed Woodpecker, these birds are no longer plentiful, do not taste good, and Madame Ulysse has been earning a good income showing these birds to the professors from the north.

—The Mayor