Galatea Monday resides corporeally in New Toulouse with her bulldog Al Capone, loads of books, and a few spirits. She also owns and operates the Haunted Jellyfish, New Toulouse’s premiere ghost gallery and studio.
Send your questions to Miss Gala by mailing or dropping a note into the mailbox at our headquarters.
Dear Miss Gala,
What should I feed my baby gator?
Signed,
Nervous in New Toulouse
Dear Nervous,
Lady fingers.
Chaleureusement,
Miss Gala
Dear Miss Gala,
I am a young man and in business. I think a good deal of a girl who comes into the store, and believe she does the same of me. My acquaintance with her has been only a business way. Realizing the position I am in, would it be impolite for me to ask her to go out with me some time?
—Timid
Dear Timid,
You haven’t mentioned what your business is. If you are her gynecologist, then, yes, that may be a bit of a prickly situation. However, if the nature of your business is one in which you are on neutral footing, then there is certainly nothing impolite in asking the young woman out for dinner. However, if you are exceedingly shy, then start with coffee, perhaps late in the day, and you can see if that leads naturally to dinner. Or you can consult our New Toulouse Guide for other great ideas to complement any type of date you choose.
Bonne chance!
Miss Gala
Dear Miss Gala,
My wife is the chattiest gal I know. How can I keep her quiet without hurting her feelings?
Signed,
Livid in the Library
Dear Livid,
Try a kiss.
Chaleureusement,
Miss Gala
Dear Miss Gala,
I am a young man of 24 and in love with a married woman. I have known her several years and love her with all my heart, and would do anything for her. She is never out of my mind wherever I go. Is it right for me to love her so?
—J. L.
Dear J. L.,
D. H. Lawrence said, “Love is the flower of life, and blossoms unexpectedly and without law, and must be plucked where it is found, and enjoyed for the brief hour of its duration.” He also warned that life is for living, not saving. So …
If we are to accept the wisdom of one of our greatest writers of love and erotica, I would say that yes, it is. One cannot help whom one loves.
The real question is, should you pursue it? And only you and she can answer that. Do take care to remember that there are other hearts involved, and that there are both rewards and consequences for our choices.
Bien des choses à tous,
Miss Gala
Dear Miss Gala,
How do I get bloodstains out of my man’s sofa?
Your friend,
D
Dear D,
Depending on whose bloodstains they are and how good a storyteller you are, you may not need to worry, but you should know that the saliva of the person whose blood it is should do the trick. If not, check out Miss Yelly’s selection of new furniture at Noctis, and call it a late Valentine’s gift!
Chaleureusement,
Miss Gala